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Post by robin on Nov 24, 2023 15:41:15 GMT -6
#s://i~ibb~co/XSZtWPV/Turtlewhisker-posting-pic~jpg Turtlewhisker The snow crunched beneath her paws as the tortoiseshell followed a familiar path that she now knew from heart. She didn't visit as often these days, a source a great remorse in her life, though leaf-bare rarely left room for social calls, especially where the other party didn't offer much by way of conversation. It was more important to focus on the living, though it still stung to remind herself that he was no longer counted among that number. The graves were easy to identify, some were bare mounds buried beneath the snow that she weaved between, others had wilted flowers that weren't long for this world, someone had obviously cared enough to hunt for the rare plants that had not yet been killed by the freezing temperatures. Turtlewhisker stopped beside a mound with no identifiable markers, her heart ached to see how barren it looked. Leaf-bare could not harm him anymore, but it continued to torment... "Hello, my love" she purred, a sad smile appearing on her face as she sat, the cold air ruffling her fur and causing her to draw her tail closer around her paws. It made no sense that this was her favourite place to come to think, maybe feeling close to him brought some comfort, even after all this time. "I'm sorry it's been so long" she apologized, ears flattening to her head when she realized how foolish she'd look if anyone saw her. Sitting there, speaking as if she expected to hear an answer. "Cinderstar chose her deputy today, but I suppose you knew that already" Starclan had a plan, that's what she was told when bad things happened as a kit - don't worry, Starclan has a plan for everyone. What was their plan for her then? She shouldn't be bitter, it wasn't as though Nettlefang didn't deserve the promotion, it was just that, she felt she deserved it more.Resentment came easily to the she-cat, and she was content to settle within that emotion for a while. Cinderstar didn't even like Nettlefang the last time she'd checked, and now she was looking to her to step into a leadership position. Turtlewhisker had already given up so much in the name of ambition, and now she was faced with the prospect of never advancing under her sisters leadership. Yes. She quite liked the idea of stewing in her bitterness for a while longer - at least out here, she could be alone with those feelings. The dead weren't big talkers. |
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storms make trees take deeper roots
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Post by cosmic on Dec 3, 2023 20:57:02 GMT -6
#s://i~pinimg~com/564x/1a/24/76/1a2476fe9ab2daef64c48b516b301499~jpg | houndjaw
may I stand unshaken...
amidst, amidst a crash of worlds |
However, with the rest of the day to himself until a possible dusk patrol, he wasn't sure what to do with his time. Normally, he would check to see what Swiftwind was up to, but some cats dragged him away to a hunting patrol, as he heard from a tunneler when he was looking for him. Houndjaw silently trudged along, before deciding to make his was to the rosemary hill by himself.
It was weird, really. He felt solace in the graveyard of PrairieClan's past. More so than he had felt when visiting MistClan's gravesite when that was his home. Perhaps he finally felt connected to the clan that took him in, despite not being aware of his past.
Then, his thoughts halted as he noticed fresh footsteps toward the graves. Another cat seemed to have had the same idea it seems. Perhaps he could strike up a conversation with them, to give him motivation to not laze the day away as he desired.
As he approached, he heard the beginning of a she-cat speaking. He managed not to really be able to tell what she said, but as he made his way into the gravesite, he saw who it was. Turtlewhisker, speaking to Tanglebreeze. Houndjaw couldn't help but lower his tail at the sight. He had freshly joined PrairieClan when the tunnels collapsed during the bad storm. He remembered all the cats that had been lost. His circumstance with loss was completely different than most cats, considering he killed the cat that was considered a death in his family, so the anxiety of being able to comfort the she-cat bellowed in his belly.
However, he would try.
Being a distance away, he didn't want to sneak up on the she-cat, so he let out a soft trill to alert her of his presence. Houndjaw's tail joined in his warm expression, lifting to the sky in greeting. "Mind if I join ya there, Turtlewhisker?" he commented, before dipping his head.
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Post by robin on Dec 4, 2023 15:38:45 GMT -6
#s://i~ibb~co/XSZtWPV/Turtlewhisker~jpg Turtlewhisker All was silent, save for the lonely call of a magpie as it flew overhead. The tortoiseshell's paws shuffled in the snow, her pads had long since gone numb which was a blessing, considering the alternative. The deep ache of cold as it seeped in between her toes and burrowed beneath the surface. She shivered against a chill breeze as it blew across the hill, ears pinning as she braced herself against the wind. Leaf-bare. It was the worst time to come here, but often when she felt like she needed to feel his presence the most. Did Starclan warriors ever miss the living? It was difficult to imagine that he might miss her the way that she missed him. Was it hard for him to watch her continuing to live life, whilst he was frozen in time. Did he resent her? For the choices she'd made when they were young, for refusing them a family and instead focusing on a dream that now would never become reality. She flinched when a voice spoke from behind, and she turned- it was foolish, that she'd half expected to see him standing there, stars strewn within his pelt, smiling that crooked smile as if no time had passed at all. But of course, that was not the case. "Houndjaw" she breathed, offering the tabby a welcoming smile that shouldn't have felt as fake as it did. He asked to join her and she flicked her tail, gesturing for him to sit beside her. It wasn't that she particularly wanted the company, times like these it was nice to talk to Tanglebreeze without fearing judgement from those who expected her to move on - grief did not have a timeline, and still she felt as though there were things she only wanted to tell him. The only thing that had changed was that he was no longer there to hear them. But, everyone was welcome to visit rosemary hill. To feel close to starclan and grieve for those they had lost. She would not begrudge him that right, especially when he was so far from where his own kin were likely buried. "I didn't expect to run into anyone out here today" she admitted, the cold usually kept the majority away. Though, looking at Houndjaw's thick tabby pelt, she assumed the weather didn't bother him as it did her. A shiver passed up her spine as she thought about it a moment too long. "Did you lose someone?" she asked, assuming that was why he had come to the gravesite, to pay his respects and to stew in his own grief. Maybe it was inappropriate to ask, too personal, but Turtlewhisker wasn't known for her tact. |
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storms make trees take deeper roots
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Post by cosmic on Jan 5, 2024 20:39:16 GMT -6
#s://i~pinimg~com/564x/1a/24/76/1a2476fe9ab2daef64c48b516b301499~jpg | houndjaw
may I stand unshaken...
amidst, amidst a crash of worlds |
The tom settled himself next to the she-cat, as his thick fur encompassed the side of the molly that he sat on. He wondered how PrairieClan cats were able to be so comfortable during leaf-bare, as most had short fur. Maybe they weren't? Turtlewhisker's comment certainly suggested it. "I didn't either, I suppose. It's a nice place where I like to... reflect."
The reason for his reflection, however, he wouldn't comment on. He tried to come often to pray to StarClan. For what, he wasn't sure. He hoped that maybe if he devoted himself, perhaps they would forgive him for his past life. Maybe he would be welcomed into the ranks of his ancestors.
But, Turtlewhisker's question brought him out of his thoughts. For a moment, his heart skipped a beat, and then began to beat out of his chest. Ever since arriving, he had never given thought about telling others about the loss of his life. As far as he was concerned, telling others would only cause them to be more suspicious of him. But, seeing Turtlewhisker mourning the loss of her late mate... he knew she needed someone who knew similar pain.
"I have, unfortunately," he began. He gave a great sigh, which was easily disguised as his grief, rather than his anxiety. "My brother, Torntail. Ever since comin' to PrairieClan, I've not been able to visit his grave. I doubt MistClan would let me cross the border just to visit his burial place. However, when I'm here, it gives me... relief." |
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Post by robin on Mar 29, 2024 16:23:36 GMT -6
#s://i~ibb~co/XSZtWPV/Turtlewhisker~jpg Turtlewhisker His fur brushed her flank as he settled beside her, and she traced shapes in the snow at her paws. It seemed as though the hill where their clanmates were buried attracted many looking for some quiet reflection, eager to snatch brief moments of contemplation when there was so little time to be still and do so within the bustling routine of the clan. "I understand" she mewed, casting the tom a sideways glance "sometimes it feels like this is the only place where I can be alone with my thoughts" or, mostly alone. The graveyard was where she felt closest to Starclan, where she believed that they could hear her as she spoke her troubles aloud. They wouldn't repeat her words to anyone, it was the perfect arrangement. The molly's heart ached for Houndjaw, when her clanmate revealed the loss of his brother. She couldn't imagine the pain of losing a littermate, her own sisters were both still with her and despite their differences, they held the bond that only siblings knew. "I'm sorry" her voice was quiet, tail brushing his flank in a gesture meant to provide comfort.
"I believe that they can hear us, that they listen..." she mewed, shuffling her paws in the snow and casting a glance towards Tanglebreeze's grave. "I don't think it matters where he is buried, if you wish to speak to him then he'll hear you" there was no way to know if Starclan were listening or not, but she found it comforted her to believe that they were. "You probably don't remember, it was so many moons ago" and yet, it still hurt like a recent wound. "Tanglebreeze, my mate, he died in a tunnel collapse" her claws flexed against the unyielding ground, frozen beneath her paws. "It sounds silly, but I speak to him and it helps, to believe that he's still here, that he's listening" but maybe Houndjaw wouldn't appreciate that advice, he might have a different idea on what would help him on his own journey with grief. |
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storms make trees take deeper roots
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Post by cosmic on Apr 29, 2024 11:22:36 GMT -6
#s://i~pinimg~com/564x/1a/24/76/1a2476fe9ab2daef64c48b516b301499~jpg Houndjaw was glad that Turtlewhisker agreed that this was a good place to reflect. The tom found himself here often, usually looking for herbs to bring back to Lionflower and Maplefrost, but it gave him some quiet from the hustle and bustle of camp. Some place where he could be truly himself.
Suddenly, and it almost made him jolt forward, he felt the tail of the she-cat brush up against his flank in condolences for his lost sibling. The brown tabby had learned how to mask his true feelings of his brother under a sorrowful face, but it didn't mean that he didn't have empathy for Torntail. Everyone can be ambitious, and the only place for a warrior to grow is becoming a deputy. Some warriors are fine with becoming senior warriors, and retiring as elders when their fight is over. But there's always something alluring when dreaming about one's name being called upon by the leader to be the second-in-command. Just... Torntail's ambition was too much.
Turtlewhisker talked about the ones that they have lost are able to hear them. StarClan, what would Torntail say? Was he even in StarClan? And if he was, then what would Houndjaw even have to be able to say to him? He was a murderer, a cold blooded killer, how could he even prepare to let his brother hear his thoughts?
"I... I like that thought." He finally admitted, his tail growing spikey with a chilling wind along the hill. "Torntail and I had differences," Houndjaw mewed. Rather big differences. "But he was my brother still. I just wish ida spoke to him more when he was still here." Maybe if Houndjaw talked to Torntail, he would still be here today. Houndjaw would still be in MistClan, his original home.
It was Turtlewhisker's turn, and the name was not familiar to him. Tanglebreeze's death must have been before the brute had joined PrairieClan. Not enough to really know him before the clan just whispered about his death for moons to come, especially now with the uncertainty of the safety of the tunnels. Houndjaw is sure that Cinderstar would have to address the tunnels at some point.
"I'm sorry for ya loss, as well." He replied back, the same tone as she had about his loss. "Losin' a mate and losin' a sibling are two different kinds of grief, not comparable in the slightest. But, hopefully, we can find solace together here." For him, the Rosemary Hill had some sort of healing energy to him, as though he felt more connected than ever to his new home and to the ancestors of the past. "I'm sure Tangle is here for ya. He's prolly sit right on the other side of ya, just keepin' ya company."
However, there seemed to be something else lingering around, other than the pressure of grief and loss. But, he wouldn't press. "Is ya sister ready for leadership? Not that I doubt 'er, but it'sa big task for anyone."
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