A dainty, long furred cream cat with darker ginger markings.

-

Like most of RidgeClan, Morninglight's height makes him cast an imposing silhouette. However, underneath his long fur is a slender cat. He's thin to the point of being frail, especially as he ages, with weak joints after many moons of pushing himself. Likely, Morninglight will consider an early retirement to nurse his bones.

Morninglight's features aren't striking or handsome when you look at them piece by piece: large, green eyes, too large for his narrow face; wide ears he never fully grew into; a pointed muzzle, almost fox-like; thin, wispy fur like a cloud slowly falling apart, trailing off into the sky. Still, his particular appearance comes together to form an interesting looking cat. One that might not be handsome at first but, after some time has passed, you wonder why you never considered handsome to begin with.

Primarily, Morninglight is covered in cream fur of a medium to long length, with his longest fur making up his mane. His face is a brighter ginger than most of his body, with fine, dark tabby markings. Dark ginger stripes so thick you can hardly call them stripes cover most of his back and tail, trailing down to pattern his hind legs, too.

Meadowstorm has never believed in limiting herself, including where lovers are concerned. She's a young warrior - freshly 20 moons, popular and well-regarded, shouldn't she be able to enjoy herself? She's honest with her partners, and none of them complain, so she has little cause for concern until one day she feels a stirring. By then, it's too late.

A few moon pass and Meadowstorm welcomes a single kit into the world, born just after dawn in the middle of leaf-fall. The kit is noisy and squirming and not at all the cute bundle of joy other queens assured her a kitten would be, but Meadowstorm loves the kit anyway. She loves the neediness between them as the kit feeds and she gives, both of them desperate to be loved by the other. She loves the way the kit's nose wriggles after yawning, a sure sign of a personality already forming. She loves the faintest stripes of ginger, barely visible amongst bright, downy fur. She loves the constant warmth at her side. She loves how she already feels loss, thinking of the day the kit will join the apprentice den, leaving her alone.

She loves the kit. Her child.

She names him Morningkit, for the dawn that welcomed him.

-

Though he's the only kit in his litter, Morningkit is far from alone in the nursery. He's quick to befriend the other litters born just before and just after him, collecting a handful of close friends across the other families in the nursery. Morningkit's first friend is Cliffkit, born just a few days after him, the runt of her litter. Next is Whitekit, who later is covered in splotches of gray that make their name seem ill-suited. Whitekit is older and already friends with Sparrowkit, who zips around the nursery with unmatched speed that Meadowstorm compliments. Morningkit may have been an only child, but with friends like these, he never feels alone.

Then, there's Eveningkit.

He's an only child, like Morningkit, but with an older litter of brothers all nearing the end of their apprentice training, making him seem older and wiser just by virtue of knowing them. It helps that he's the oldest kit in the nursery, three moons older than Morningkit, just about ready to take on his new name. Though they never really speak as kits, Morningkit thinks they're friends anyway, and eagerly awaits the day he can join Eveningkit in the apprentice den.

-

"Who's your dad?" The question is posed by Cliffkit. They're both four moons now, old enough to have real conversations. Lately, that means talking about the weird things Cliffkit's siblings do, or who they think is going to mentor Sparrowkit next moon. "Or like, your other parent."

Morningkit didn't know. He never bothered to ask. He knew most kits had two parents, except for Whitekit who only had one because their mother died during kitting, which Morningkit didn't quite understand yet, but he never once asked his mother where his other parent was. "I dunno."

"That's cool," is all Cliffkit says.

Later, when he asks Meadowstorm, his mother pulls him close and curls a tail around him. "Not everyone has two parents," she says, gentle and firm all at once. It's a tone reserved for mothers. "We don't need a big family. We just need each other."

Each other is all he knows, so Morningkit agrees.

-

His remaining time in the nursery goes by in a blur, and next thing he knows, Morningpaw is standing beside Cliffpaw and her siblings as they're all named. He's apprenticed to Sootfur, a bushy tom with dark fur and a bright smile. Immediately, Morningpaw feels at ease with his new mentor, even if the two of them together puts a sour expression he doesn't understand on his mother's face.

Sootfur is full of ideas of where to start with Morningpaw's training. "Crouches, of course," he says. "Oh, no - let's talk about types of prey. Or, do you want to explore the territory?" Before Morningpaw can answer, Sootfur continues, "Have you ever thought about being a Guardian?"

The last question makes Morningpaw laugh. He's tall, but most days he's confident a stern wind will blow him over. "I haven't thought about it," he admits. "And I want to do everything you said!"

"Then we'll do everything."

-

As the first moon of his training passes, Morningpaw realizes how lucky he is to have a mentor like Sootfur. Cliffpaw's mentor is quiet and soft-spoken, traits Cliffpaw worries she'll end up adopting. Whitepaw and Sparrowpaw both have harsh mentors. They spend nearly every meal complaining about their aches from training too hard. Sootfur feels like a blessing in comparison. He never pushes Morningpaw beyond his limits. In fact, after a moon of training, Morningpaw can't even remember ever feeling tired.

But he's also never caught anything, which Cliffpaw says is weird, though Sootfur says is normal. He's never been able to pin another apprentice to the ground, but Sootfur says he's not ready to practice fighting yet. He's never visited the gathering place or a border with another clan, but Sootfur says he will when he's older.

"We just sort of... walk around," Morningpaw says, trying to explain to the cluster of apprentices sharing tongues what he does with Sootfur all day. "And we talk a lot. Sometimes we do hunting practice."

"What do you talk about?"

Suddenly uncomfortable, Morningpaw doesn't want to answer the question. He shrugs. "Just stuff. He wants me to try being a Guardian."

That clears the judgmental look from the other apprentices' faces. "Oh! Neat!"

"Yeah, it's neat."

-

Another half moon goes by before it finally strikes Morningpaw as weird that Sootfur cares so much about him becoming a Guardian. Sootfur isn't a Guardian. Doesn't even really seem friends with Guardians, and yet the topic comes up all the time. "It's prestigious," Sootfur says. Morningpaw barely knows what that means. "It'd be a great honor. Your mom would be proud." Meadowstorm was already proud, though. She told him that every time they had a meal. "How is your mom, by the way?"

"She's fine," Morningpaw says. It's the same thing he always says when Sootfur asks after Meadowstorm, something he does more and more often. "Can we hunt today?"

"You think you're ready, bud?"

It's not said with malice. Or disrespect. Or doubt. It's kind, like his mentor really cares if he's ready or not. Sootfur is so kind. He's always so damn kind. Morningpaw doesn't want him to be kind - he wants to learn how to catch something. "Yeah. I've been ready."

Sootfur smiles, then shows him a crouch.

Morningpaw still comes home emptyhanded. 

-

"Would you like to come hunting with me and Birchwhisker?" Eveningpaw approaches Morningpaw on a not-so-rare moment when he's alone, cleaning out the apprentice den while Sootfur patrols without him, and the other apprentices train with their mentors. Morningpaw blinks in surprise - he and Eveningpaw are friendly, but they only talk with other cats around - then beams, bounding over toward the older apprentice.

"Now?"

Eveningpaw smiles. Morningpaw nearly stops in his tracks, unsure when he ever saw such an expression on Eveningpaw's face. "Yes, now. You ready?"

"So ready!"

-

That day, Morningpaw catches his first mouse with Eveningpaw and Birchwhisker's help. His paws hurt as he trots back into camp, holding his prey proudly, Eveningpaw and his mentor equally proud at his side. The moment is shattered by Sootfur hurrying over to him after he adds his catch to the freshkill pile. "Oh, Morningpaw," Sootfur says, full of concern and soft tuts. "Are you okay? How do you feel?"

"I feel fine!" He feels embarrassed. He's hot under his pelt, prickling with discomfort at how overbearing Sootfur seemed in the moment. 

"Birchwhisker is really strict... Are you sure? Do your paws hurt? Are you sore anywhere?"

Morningpaw makes a face. "I'm fine. Look, I caught something!"

Finally, Sootfur smiles. "You did a great job, bud."

-

It's clear to everyone, Morningpaw included, that he's behind all the other apprentices, even as Sootfur starts to make more of an effort. He can barely keep up with Cliffpaw when they patrol or hunt together. He tires more easily than Sparrowpaw. He can't wrap his head around strategy like Whitepaw does. He tries, oh StarClan does he try, but Sootfur's tutelage just isn't enough.

The next time Eveningpaw approaches him, Morningpaw says yes before Eveningpaw can even ask. This time, it's just the two of them. Eveningpaw walks him through the basics of sparring, something Sootfur is still reluctant to do. Each time they try a new form, Morningpaw ends up on the ground, pinned under Eveningstep, but losing feels incredible compared to not trying. "You can always train with me," Eveningpaw says after the sixth round. "And Birchwhisker. She says you can come with us on every patrol, as long as you're not tired."

Morningpaw takes him up on that. His days are split more than he can reasonably give - half his time with Sootfur, hunting with more confidence and patrolling lazily around borders; the other half with Eveningpaw and Birchwhisker, learning sparring forms and advanced techniques to make him a better hunter. He's sore every night he sleeps, and still sore when he wakes up in the morning, but it's worth it to finally improve.

-

Eveningpaw is named Eveningstep at 15 moons, his time as an apprentice extended due to his Guardian training. Morningpaw sneaks out of his den late at night to hurry over to Eveningstep as he stands vigil, pressing his nose to the unexpecting Eveningstep's with a bright smile. "Save a spot in the warriors den for me," he says with a wink, knowing Eveningstep can't respond with anything more than a gentle smile.

It makes Morningpaw's heart race.

-

"He is ready for his assessment." That voice is Birchwhisker's. Morningpaw can hear her, despite her hushed tone, her voice leaking up from the leader's den. It's followed quickly by Sootfur's.

"He's not. He hasn't even tried Guardian training, yet."

They're talking about him. He knows it. Sootfur's words fill him with anger. Already, Morningpaw was held back a moon, not named alongside Cliffpaw and her siblings like he should've been. And Sootfur wanted him to wait longer? "Guardian training- he's not going to be a Guardian, Sootfur."

"If you just give him time-"

"He doesn't need time. He needs a mentor who'll get him his name."

There's a volley of accusations thrown between the two of them. That Birchwhisker is interfering. That Sootfur is purposefully hindering Morningpaw's growth. That Birchwhisker is just lonely, because her old apprentice was a warrior now. That Sootfur was biased, because Morningpaw might've been his son.

That made Morningpaw frown.

In the end, the leader's voice cut through the grumbling warriors, declaring that Morningpaw should be tested later that day.

-

He's named Morninglight for his good nature, the leader says. It's a flattering suffix. One Meadowstorm says suits him, and he always did like to please his mother.

But Cliffpaw was named Cliffclaw for her sparring, Whitepaw named Whitegaze for his perception, and Sparrowpaw named Sparrowleap for his athleticism. They were named because they were good warriors. Morninglight doesn't miss how he was only named for a good nature.

-

"It's a beautiful name," Eveningstep says, a few days after Morninglight joins the warriors den. "Morninglight."

Morninglight blushes under his fur.

Maybe it's not so bad a name.

-

A moon goes by.

Every day, Morninglight learns new aches.

But the worst of all is the ache every time Eveningstep looks at him. The longing. It's sweet in some ways and terrible in others. He wants Eveningstep to look at him and only him, but as time goes on Morninglight knows his friend's eyes are elsewhere. They're pointed up. At StarClan. At leadership. Eveningstep has aspirations, and all Morninglight has is a crush.

-

"Arthritis," the medicine cat says. It's the fourth time Morninglight has visited in as many moons, just for something to soothe the pain. "It's an illness of the bone. Cold weather hurts it," that made sense, it was leaf-bare now, "and sunlight soothes it. It will come and go in waves, but you can still be a warrior."

At least he has an explanation for why he struggles to keep up, even now as a warrior.

He's not sure it soothes him.

-

"My brother had it," Sootfur says. Morninglight makes a questioning noise in response. "Arthritis. When you were little, I heard your mother say she started having pain in her bones after you were born. It happened to my mother, too."

It's another explanation for something Morninglight never understood as an apprentice. Why Sootfur babied him. Doted on him. "You knew?"

"I suspected. But I thought you'd be okay. Dustfang - my brother - went on to become a Guardian despite the pain."

Another explanation. "What happened to Dustfang?"

For a moment, Sootfur was somewhere else, his eyes cloudy and distant in grief. "Badger fight," he said eventually. "The wound got infected. It was just before you were born."

Morninglight didn't know enough to understand the depths of Sootfur's grief. He didn't know how it was Sootfur meant to go on patrol instead of Dustfang. He didn't know how Sootfur begged and pleaded his brother to swap places with him so he could spend time with Meadowstorm. He didn't know how Dustfang agreed, admonishing Sootfur fondly, reminding him that Meadowstorm wasn't the sort of cat to settle down. He didn't know that Sootfur blamed himself and his dalliances for Dustfang's death.

But he knew Sootfur cared about him, and he resolved to dismiss whatever resentment he held toward his former mentor. 

-

Toadpaw is bizarrely responsible for a cat of six moons. Morninglight assumes that's why he's given to Eveningstep, who he recalled as being a bit gruffer than Toadpaw at that age, but equally stoic and sensible. "You should let me come with you," he says idly to Eveningstep one early morning. "Someone has to teach Toadpaw how to have fun."

Eveningstep's chuckle is deep and resonant, rumbling in his chest. Nothing makes Morninglight's heart race quite like hearing him laugh. "I know how to have fun."

Morninglight scoffs. "Sure, Eve. Whatever you say."

"I know how to have fun," Eveningstep repeats. "You taught me that, sunshine." Another chuckle, another rush of blood to his head. Morninglight feels dizzy with affection. It's all he can do to press his nose to Eveningstep's side, letting his friend's purrs wash over him. "Give me a little longer with him. I think he almost understands."

"Sure," Morninglight agrees, because he'd agree to anything in that moment. "A little longer."

-

They haven't talked about it, but everyone knows they'll be mates one day.

-

"Tough guy's not going too hard on you, is he?" Morninglight says the first time he meets Toadpaw properly. The young tom looks nervous, surrounded by Eveningstep's friends.

"Don't let him fool you into thinking he's your ally. Morninglight just wants gossip."

"Hey!" Morninglight laughs, free and joyful, the sort of laugh that summons a smile from Eveningstep every time. "I can be an ally and want gossip." In response, Eveningstep nuzzles against him, and for a moment it's like they're the only two cats in the world.

Attention quickly snaps back to their other friends and Toadpaw. Morninglight isn't embarrassed by the affection between them, but he'd be lying if the lack of labels didn't bother him. "Would you come patrolling with us?" Eveningstep asked at the end of the meal they all shared. "I want to show Toadpaw the territory at night."

"'Course I will."

-

Moons pass in a comfortable routine. The pain of Morninglight's youth has slowed, leaving him only with pain during the coldest moons and the rainiest days. He proves himself to be a competent hunter, more so than when he was young, but more importantly, he learns the value of being a competent friend. His help is asked for everywhere. Mediating two cats having an argument. Overseeing a young apprentice with an attitude. Kitsitting when a queen is tired and weary. 

His favorite thing, of course, is when Eveningstep asks him to join in a training session with Toadpaw. It happens more and more often as Toadpaw reaches his later moons. He's built like Morninglight - tall, but slender, and Eveningstep seems to think Morninglight has something to offer him.

"He almost called you dad the other day, on accident." The two of them are walking side by side back to camp. Like training time with Toadpaw, one on one time with Eveningstep - quiet patrols, just the two of them - is more and more frequent. Morninglight cracks a grin and jokes, "we're like his parents."

"He has parents." Eveningstep is stern with him. It's different from his usual gruff exterior, enough to make Morninglight pause. "He doesn't need us to be his parents. He just needs me to be his mentor."

"It - it was a joke, Eve," Morninglight insists.

"Do you think his apprenticeship is a joke?"

"That's not what I meant, and you know it."

Eveningstep sighs. "I know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap." A pause and then, "it's a sore topic for me. Toadpaw is having... conflict with his family, and the last thing I want is to be seen as a substitute father."

"I didn't know."

"I know. Again, I'm sorry." Another sigh. "I'm not interested in fatherhood, anyway."

That sounded like a different conversation. One that might hurt him, if he thought too hard about it. Like a bruise, he pressed further. "Not even a little? What about taking a mate?"

"I don't have time for that. StarClan has bigger plans for me."

In the silence that followed Eveningstep's admittance, Morninglight heard his heart scatter across the forest floor.

-

Eventually, Morninglight is given his own apprentice, a young cat named Palepaw with bright, clever eyes and a knack for speaking out of turn. Palepaw turns out to be the perfect excuse to distance himself from Eveningstep, claiming he's too busy training. They speak on it just once - "Come with us, tonight?" Eveningstep asks, a smidge too close to Morninglight. Like how they used to stand when Morninglight thought they were something.

"Can't, promised Palepaw we'd go out."

"Bring them, too."

Morninglight shakes his head. "They can't keep up with you and Toadpaw yet."

"I miss you."

"Sorry, Eve. Gotta be a good mentor."

There's a flash of something in Eveningstep's eyes, but Morninglight can't read it. "Of course."

-

"Good evening, Morninglight," Wolfsong says as Morninglight returns from a hunt. "Can we talk about Palepaw?"

He remembers when Wolfsong was first appointed deputy, not long ago. At the time, he liked the decision. Liked Wolfsong. Even maybe harbored a crush on him - not that it meant much. Morninglight knew he could be loose in his affections; his mother often teased him for being similar to her. Now, he was nervous. Defensive. He didn't know what it meant for the deputy to want to talk about his apprentice. "Sure."

"Actually, I wanted to join you two for a patrol. Tomorrow?"

"Sure."

-

Morninglight isn't sure who's more nervous: himself or Palepaw as Wolfsong joins them.

It goes fine, of course. Wolfsong praises Palepaw's young hunting instinct excessively, and after they return to camp, he praises Morninglight, too. "I knew you'd be the right match," he says proudly. "Many wanted Palepaw reined in, but I thought someone lively could show them ways to be a warrior without breaking their spirit."

Morninglight smiles. "You think I'm lively?"

"I think a great deal of you."

It's not flirting, is it? Morninglight is used to flirting with cats. He's not used to cats flirting with him. (In the future, he'll know the behavior for what it was: manipulation. Wolfsong wanted followers, and Morninglight was desperate for cats to like him. He was an easy target.) "I think highly of you, too, Wolfsong."

"That pleases me to hear."

-

"May I patrol with you and Palepaw?"

It's been a few days since he and Eveningstep last spoke privately. They still see each other - they nest next to each other, take meals with each other. But they're never alone, not since Eveningstep broke his heart. "I dunno, we're just going to-"

"Please, Morninglight," Eveningstep interrupts. "Say yes. Let me come with you."

"You sure?"

"I don't understand what I did to upset you, but please let me make it up to you."

Morninglight blinks back tears. "I'm not upset with you, Eve."

"Then stop avoiding me. I miss you."

Maybe he was lying to himself, thinking all was normal between him and Eveningstep. Maybe what he viewed as acceptable after heartbreak was unbearable for Eveningstep, who didn't really do anything wrong. Maybe, with Toadfeather a warrior now, the loss of his apprentice and best friend was more profound. Morninglight sighs, then nods. "Yeah, come along."

-

"Will you ever tell me what I did?" Eveningstep asks on their patrol. A few paces ahead, Palepaw is chasing after a cricket.

"You didn't do anything." Morninglight flicks his tail across Eveningstep's flank reassuringly. "I've just been in a mood."

He knows Eveningstep doesn't believe him, but they're both gracious enough to say nothing further.

-

Their close friendship returns. And when Palepaw slips up and calls him dad, Morninglight digs his claws into the dirt and refuses to look in Eveningstep's direction.

-

"Does Palepaw seem capable of Guardian training?" Wolfsong asks over one of their meals. It's just the two of them today. Sometimes it's more - Wolfsong's close friends, or Eveningstep, or even just a random assortment of clanmates. "She's sturdy."

Sturdier than Morninglight, certainly. "She has the size for it," he agrees. "But isn't interested. If anything, I think she's more interested in what the Oracle does."

"Is she?" The admittance pleases Wolfsong. Morninglight can tell from the way his gaze lowers appreciatively, like Morninglight has brought him the best news he's heard in days. "Interesting. I'll pass that along. Should we arrange her assessment soon, then?"

"Yeah. I'll be sad to see her go, but she's ready." Wolfsong purrs in pleasure and agreement and quietly, Morninglight resolves to please his deputy more often.

-

For the first time in Morninglight's life, he thinks Eveningstep looks nervous when he speaks. "You spend much of your time with Wolfsong."

"Jealous?"

"A little."

Morninglight dips his head apologetically. "He's pretty involved in Palepaw's training."

"Is that all?"

"Yes? You really do sound jealous, Eve."

"Perhaps I am." The curiosity in his friend's tone sent a hopeful pang through Morninglight's heart. "There's nothing... happening, between you two?"

Sometimes, he wished there was. But Morninglight was wise enough to know when a cat was just being friendly, and Wolfsong was nothing but friendly. "No. He's so focused on his role, I don't know if he ever thinks about that sort of thing."

Eveningstep nods, far more relaxed now. "I understand that. RidgeClan comes first, always."

"You two are so alike," Morninglight scoffs, ignoring how the hope died in his chest before it really had a chance to bloom.

-

Not long after, Palepaw becomes Palebelly, and Wolfsong becomes Wolfstar.

RidgeClan is a different place now. Morninglight can feel the shift the night Wolfstar is named, like a blanket of humidity fallen over their camp. It's thick. Protective. Suffocating.

He gets a strange feeling in his gut that never goes away.

-

"You're right." Morninglight looks up when Eveningstep joins him in their shared nests. "Wolfstar and I are similar."

"Yeah?"

"I've always liked him," Eveningstep continues. "I like the ideas he has. The future looks bright for RidgeClan."

Despite the warmth of his best friend pressed close to him, Morninglight can't help but shiver. 

-

With each rise and fall of the sun it becomes easier to see Wolfstar's impact. RidgeClan is so divided. Everyone wants what's best for their clan, but the line between those who agree with Wolfstar and those who don't is clear. Morninglight walks along it; some days, he feels like the only one stuck in this limbo. He likes Wolfstar. He likes the stability his early moons of leadership brought. He likes the idea that their leader is star touched.

But he hates the superiority. And as the moons go on, Morninglight fears the violence behind his leader's words.

Behind Eveningstep's words.

-

"MistClan doesn't have to suffer for RidgeClan to prosper," Morninglight says quietly. He's trembling. He's afraid of the cat in front of him - afraid of his best friend, of Eveningstep. His fear must be noticeably, because the raised fur along Eveningstep's spine settles, and the fierce light in his eyes soften.

"No," Eveningstep says. His voice used to be soothing. "No, of course they don't. I'm sorry. Did I scare you?"

"You're still scaring me," Morninglight says, honest. "Eve, this isn't like you." To proclaim that MistClan had to surrender, had to submit? All so Wolfstar could have more access to the moonpool? Morninglight didn't understand. The forest was in agreement - cats could access their ancestors whenever they wanted, regardless of territory lines. 

"It's - it's Wolfstar's plan. We should support him." But in the face of Morninglight's fear, Eveningstep's faith in their leader seems to waver.

"We should help guide him," Morninglight pleads. He thinks he sees understanding on Eveningstep's face. "He can do great things but not at the expense of other clans."

"You're right," Eveningstep says quickly. He takes a hesitant step toward Morninglight, who nods his permission. Eveningstep closes the space between them without another word. "You're right. I'm sorry. Sometimes, it feels as though he's in my head."

"Put me in your head instead," Morninglight scolds. In response, Eveningstep smiles.

"You're always on my mind, sunshine."

-

Persuading Eveningstep into rationality does not douse Wolfstar's fire.

A tree falls. A bridge is formed. A plan is made.

-

RidgeClan is going to war.

-

Eveningstep volunteers to fight because he has to - he's a Guardian. He wants to protect his clan. Morninglight goes with him despite every plea to stay behind. They both know what this might mean.

-

Everything is red, red, bloody red, even under the guise of night.

-

Eveningstep is next to him, and then he isn't.

He hears his name called out, the low bass of Eveningstep's voice guiding him through the mess of cats. "We should go," Eveningstep says. "Wolfstar is going to call a retreat now that PraireClan is here." Morninglight nods his agreement, but the two of them hardly get a treelength away when Eveningstep pauses. "I see Wolfstar," he says. "Let me group up with him. You get out of here."

"No, I-"

"Please, Morninglight. The path is clear. Get out while you can."

Morninglight feels hopeless. "Come back to me, Eve. Come back."

"I will. I promise."

-

Two steps. Four steps. Eight steps. Morninglight doesn't even make it out of MistClan's camp when he turns back, unable to leave without Eveningstep at his side.

-

Wolfstar is dead. He sees his body. Sees the blood. How many lives did he still have?

-

Sparrowleap is dead. He only ever had the one life.

-

Morninglight catches up to Eveningstep as the PraireClan warrior's claws fall, tearing Eveningstep open from throat to belly.

-

-

-

-

-

Eveningstep is dead.

-

-

-

-

Blood - so much blood - oh, ancestors help him, there was so much blood.

-

-

-

His paws - soaked - the smell of blood and death and, 

-

-

Morninglight swears his wails stopped the fighting.

-





Come back to me. Come back.


I will.










I love you, I love you, please, Eve, please don't-


My sunshine. My dawn. I love you, too.














I'll see you when we're older.











"Morninglight?" The voice is Palebelly's. Morninglight doesn't remember the last time her heard her, nor the last time he heard himself. He blinks awake, crust formed at the tight corners of his eyes, beckoning him back to sleep. The overwhelming smell of herbs and flowers leaves no doubt to where he is. "I thought we could share this? I caught it."

A rabbit. Big enough for two. Morninglight's stomach rumbles - when did he last eat? "Rabbits in leaf-bare?" He croaks out in question.

"It's new-leaf," Palebelly corrects softly. "Almost green-leaf."

But it can't be, because that means half a year since Eveningstep died.

-

Recovery is slow. In the first months following Eveninstep's death, it's unmoving. Morninglight grieves and grieves and sobs and sobs and sleeps for days at a time, holed up in the medicine cat den, non-responsive to anyone. He barely eats. He doesn't groom himself. He never speaks, aside from a bittersweet, "Good," when Cliffclaw tells him Wolfstar is truly dead.

Recovery is slow, unmoving, until one day it's not.

He stretches out under the sun of an early green-leaf day and tells Palebelly he wants to visit the grave. She offers to come with him. He can't imagine a world where he turns her down. After six months of tending to him - grooming him, feeding him, talking to him, consoling him - he knows he owes her everything.

The last time he was here, it was to bury Sootfur. His mentor passed in his sleep - happy, content. Reunited with his brother.

How many moons did Morninglight have until he saw Eveningstep again? At 52 moons, he couldn't imagine it would be any time soon.

But he also couldn't imagine another 50 moons without his best friend.

My sunshine. My dawn. I love you, too.

"Idiot," Morninglight says, resting by Eveningstep's grave. "Why did you wait till the end?" On the breeze, he can hear Eveningstep's apologetic chuckle. "You were supposed to come back." The breeze stills. "I wasn't supposed to watch you die."

You were supposed to go.

Maybe. Maybe he could live easier without Eveningstep dying at his paws. Without hearing the soft confession spoken with his last breath. No sense in dwelling on it, though. He was just talking to the breeze.

"I think you'd like Mushroomstar," Morninglight says once his throat loosens and the risk of crying passes. "I know you like Toadfeather. They'll fix all this."

Never mind. The tears well back in his eyes immediately. "It should've been you, though. You should be here. Fixing this. Leading us." Morninglight lets out a shuttered breath, then rises to his paws. "I'll come back," he promises, a hollow reminder of Eveningstep's last promises. "I'll try to fix things, too."

-

Some days, he wants to leave. Abandon himself to the mountains and let the wilderness take him. He'd be reunited with Eveningstep - and everyone else he lost - sooner that way.

But he stays. He stays, and he puts the pieces of his clan back together, in hopes somehow he'll put himself back together, too.

Pre-Plotting: Hindered by grief, Morninglight wants to identify with the beliefs of Pluto. He wants to let the pain of Eveningstep's loss and the cruelty of Wolfstar's crimes swallow him up and leave him as nothing more than a bitter husk of the cat he was, rebelling against everything the clans stand for - everything that led to Wolfstar's piety. But he doesn't give into that urge, instead forcing himself into the beliefs of Saturn. He knows that's what Eveningstep would want.

Additionally, Morninglight fills the role of Morningtail from Toadfeather's wanted ad. He will potentially be Mushroomstar's future love interest. 

Family: Though Morninglight has a great relationship with his mother and loves her deeply, he struggles to have strong feelings toward the concept of family. Without much family to lean on during his formative years (and witnessing Eveningstep's much more complicated family life), Morninglight instead learned to value friendship and the bonds of clan over family. There was a time he thought that might change - that one day, he and Eveningstep would have a family of their own, and he would learn what his mother could never teach him. He was wrong.

Friends: Friendship is where Morninglight excels. He makes friends with ease and likes having a lot of them. It's hard to tell who Morninglight is closest to because of how evenly his affection is distributed among his friends. He treats them all with the same amount of love, trust, and camaraderie he would like shown to him in return. The only exception was Eveningstep, who Morninglight always favored, and everyone knew it. (Except, it seemed, Eveningstep.) In recent moons, Morninglight has relied on his friends heavily to help put him back together.

Romance: Morninglight is a flirt, a trait he hasn't been able to shake even in his darkest hours. However, he's never taken a mate. Morninglight fell in love with Eveningstep when they were both apprentices, but the feelings, to Morninglight's knowledge, were never reciprocated. Eveningstep chose clan and duty over love, and despite it all, Morninglight loved him even more for it. He doubts he'll ever love again, but on cold nights, his thoughts wander to what it might be like to have someone by his side.

Rivals: Likely, Morninglight has plenty of friendly rivals in his age range. Cats he liked to keep a healthy level of competition with, just to keep things interesting. He has no proper rivals or enemies, just a deep hatred for Wolfstar and the war he brought to the clans. His hatred is focused on the deceased leader - Morninglight can't bring himself to hate the cats who shared (or still share) his beliefs, only because he saw first hand how easy it was to be swept into them.