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Post by Deleted on Jan 13, 2024 0:26:24 GMT -6
#s://i~imgur~com/VKrOHBM~jpg | Petalshade, I wanna feel like I finally matter
I wanna be a Mona Lisa
The kind of girl that you can dream of |
She hadn’t meant to, truly, she was usually so careful but the fresh snow had caught her off guard. It was one of the first heavy snows of leaf-bare and Petalshade had been so excited! She’d checked that the sky was cloudy (and it was, not a sunbeam in sight!) and then made way out of her tunnel to enjoy the cold nipping at her paws. She liked the chill, it reminded her of late nights hunting with her father. Learning how to work the tunnels around frozen ground. She missed him dearly and taking a moment to roll in the snow was almost comforting. Of course, what she planned to be a fun little romp in the snowfalls became a rather unfortunate experience when her face started to burn. Not the playful nipping of frost but the lingering throb of a small burn, and wasn’t that just great. She didn’t understand; she’d checked to make sure the sun’s glare was hidden behind clouds and the burning ball hadn’t made an appearance once. And yet here she was, standing alone in a field feeling mouse-brained for letting herself burn when she knew better. A bone-weary sigh whooshed from her, small frame seemingly shrinking into itself as she made small sounds of frustration. She’d have to go visit Maplefrost. She liked the tom, had enjoyed getting to see him and Shrikeberry when she was younger and more prone to accidents, but these days she felt so much more like a bother. She hadn’t been around when the medicine cat had passed, was busy training with Icewind in the tunnels and after that had secluded herself to the furthest reaches of the territory, and now her attempts to reintegrate felt…stilted and awkward at best. She didn’t know what to say. Should she apologize for not being there? She wasn’t overly close with either of them so maybe that would be overstepping? But what if she didn’t say anything and that made it worse? The conflicting thoughts made the already frustrated she-cat release a small hiss and stomping of her paws, a childish outlet for her bourgeoning anxieties. She decided, after her small tantrum, that ultimately it didn’t matter how awkward it might be: she had been foolish and gotten her skin agitated and now she needed Maplefrost’s help. She gave herself one more small pout before standing up and shaking it off, quickly heading in the direction of the medicine cat’s den. ~ ~ ~ It was sun fall by the time she arrived and she hoped she wouldn’t be bothering the tom too much. She softly hummed as she approached, a way to let anyone nearby know that she was in the area in an effort to not surprise them – she had grown used to moving as a wraith, it took conscious effort to make her presence known. “Maplefrost, I hope I’m not bothering you.” Her voice was soft and followed by her peeking into the medicine den, hesitant to intrude until given permission. “I made my face angry. I thought I’d be fine since it was cloudy but I guess not…” she was clearly pouting and her inability to hide the fact only made her pout more. “I can come back tomorrow if it’s too late?” Her paws shifted in anxiety, more than ready to depart should Maplefrost be busy sleeping or doing important medicine cat business. |
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storms make trees take deeper roots
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Post by cosmic on Jan 28, 2024 0:37:46 GMT -6
#s://i~pinimg~com/564x/fa/77/b9/fa77b9edfebe3d372faa67bb868d398f~jpg
[tw: swearing, mentioning of overuse of herbs/medicine]
Even the elders had noticed now.
Maplefrost had felt himself shrink as the elders pointed out his lack of enthusiasm and how he was just going through the motions. The tom, even more so than usual, gave them a snarky response that basically told them to piss off, and he retreated back to his home in the medicine cat den after dispersing all the herbs he needed to give them. Typically nowadays, he would task his newly-appointed apprentice, Vulturepaw, to tend to the elders. They liked the elders, unlike him. However, he had sent his apprentice away for the day to learn combat basics. Just because he was a medicine cat apprentice didn't mean that Vulturepaw didn't need to know how to defend himself... especially with the current state of the valley. But, it gave them both something to do. And Maplefrost could have his time alone for a bit.
The massive tom began to sort all the herbs he had taken over to the elder's den. Carefully, he made sure that all the herbs had a place in their den. He hated this task. Unlike other tasks, which kept him busy and out of his head, this task did keep him busy but it was easy for him to fall into his head.
Since Littlestar's death, Cinderstar and Nettlefang had become the next pair of leadership in the clan. They still depended on Maplefrost some, mostly for guidance that his mother hadn't left behind before her disappearance... her disappearance, not death. Nowadays, however, the advice had slowed. Sometimes here and there, but they were starting to get their footing. Between being the medicine cat, starting his training with Vulturepaw, and helping the council, he had no time to think. But now, everything was slowing down. He was beginning to think again. And when he thought, he sinked himself deeper into his work until he had to take poppy seeds from the supply in order to cope with working faster than his body would allow him. To allow him to sleep. To allow him to stop thinking.
Cinderstar was concerned, he was sure. Probably his siblings too. But, it was a perk to be such a gruff, frigid tom to where his short responses were taken as truth. "I'm fine," he would say, before returning into the depths of his clan.
No one needed to know their medicine cat was sinking further and further down. But his mind snapped to reality at the call of his name. His head swiveled toward the direction to see a familiar face. Good, a distraction.
"Petalshade," he twitched his ears, as he flicked his tail to welcome her in. He turned his head back toward the supply of herbs before him as she spoke. Maplefrost listened, as he tried to turn off the memories that flooded back to him as she walked in. The memories of Petalshade's frequent visits when Shrikeberry was alive started to come back to him. Just what he needed, more memories and his lost clanmates to think about.
However, the battle in his mind was put to the side. "So, when are you going to learn that the sun is not your friend?" he snorted with a small chuckle at the end. His tone was his usual blunt self, but with a hint of tensing at the she-cat. Maplefrost knew she couldn't help it, and he really did feel bad for her. But, his sarcasm wasn't on hold just because he felt like shit.
"You know, Leafbare is a little different when it comes to the sun. Did you notice how it seemed brighter outside when you walked out?" Maplefrost said, with his mouth reaching down to grab poppy seeds in his mouth. The taste had become so familiar that the tartness didn't bother him any longer. "While it might be cloudy, the sun reflects off the snow, which is why it is brighter. So, that could have caused the reaction, despite it being covered by the clouds." Maplefrost dropped the poppy seeds in front of the she-cat, as he looked up for a moment to catch Petalshade's gaze. Quickly, though, he didn't meet her eyes for very long before turning. "Does that make sense?"
"I'll give you the usual herbs. Alder for inflammation and thimbleberry for healing and preventing infection incase your face starts to wound." Maplefrost gather the two herbs in his mouth and began to spitting it out as it became a poultice. "If you start to get a fever, let me know as soon as you can. There's no borage, as one of Tawnyflower's kits needed the last one. But, Lionflower and I can probably find some if needed," he said between chews.
Finally, after a bit of time, he was able to finish the poultice, as he dragged the leaf that had the substance toward the she-cat. "Lower your head," he mewed sharply, as he waited for the command to be followed before starting to slather the concoction on Petalshade's face where it was irritated.
Don't mention Shrikeberry... Don't mention Littlestar, he wanted to pleaded to the she-cat outloud.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2024 20:57:40 GMT -6
#s://i~imgur~com/VKrOHBM~jpg #s://i~imgur~com/VKrOHBM~jpg #s://i~imgur~com/VKrOHBM~jpg | Petalshade, I wanna feel like I finally matter
I wanna be a Mona Lisa
The kind of girl that you can dream of |
She entered the medicine den gingerly, looking towards her paws to ensure she didn’t accidently step on any herbs yet to be stored. She settled near Maplefrost, allowing her eyes to briefly close as she took in the familiar comfort. The ground was cool beneath her paws and the scent of earth encompassed everything, joined by the various smells of herbs still fresh dancing with those long dried. It smelled like home, much like the cool earthen scent of the tunnels did. And just like the tunnels, her heart ached with the knowledge that something was missing. Someone. “So, when are you going to learn that the sun is not your friend?”She opened her eyes as the orange tom spoke, a small smile gracing her features. “One day it will be. We just need to work out our differences.” She said it with determination, as if speaking it into existence would set it in motion. It was true to her at least; one day she would figure out how to enjoy the sunlight with her Clan. Even if it took a hundred burns, Petalshade was determined to experience the world above ground to its fullest – no matter rain or shine. Or snow. She continued to listen to him attentively, giving a small nod here and there. What he said sounded familiar, likely told to her last leaf-bare but forgotten with time. It made sense she supposed, even if hearing such things pulled at the strings of her frustration. It seemed nothing could ever be easy or simple, everything involving life above ground came with words of caution she had to diligently follow lest she face unfortunate consequences. “Does that make sense?”A hum of affirmation was her answer, bending down to lap up the poppy seeds and trying to cover the grimace that followed their tartness. She distracted herself watching him, eyes full of curiosity following his movements around the den. She’d describe it as confidence, or something close to it, the way he moved about the various herb storages. Every herb had a home and Maplefrost knew where each and every one of them resided. She wouldn’t be surprised if he knew exactly how much of each remained either. Petalshade couldn’t imagine memorizing so much, felt a creeping anxiety just thinking about it. She wondered how Vulturepaw was keeping up. “It wasn’t too bad a burn, I don’t think I’ll blister at all!” It was said with a happy chirp, a beaming smile accompanying her words. “Thank you for taking such good care of me, I appreciate the time you spend doing so.” Her father had always told her to give voice to her thanks and let others know you valued their time and efforts. Maplefrost deserved it by far, Shrikeberry too, for how diligently they cared for her health then and now. Again, her heart gave a twinge. Shrikeberry’s absence was growing more apparent the longer she lingered in the medicine den. It was a shadow seen from the corner of your eye, a nagging sense that something wasn’t quite right. It was the loss of her comforting voice, a void where her and Maplefrost’s banter once resided. Memory served to think the medicine den fuller of life then, perhaps more inviting. The Petalpaw of memory seemed to think so and suddenly Petalshade was all too aware of how quiet the den was. Her tail wrapped tightly around her, a weak attempt at comfort. She knew this atmosphere, had lived in its cage. It was the furthest tunnels deep underground. It was struggling to find anything, do anything, to avoid the swelling wave of loss – waiting for you to break, waiting to drown you. It was feeling utterly alone, longing to connect but not knowing how. It was fixing tunnels and feeling the distinct sense of wrong, knowing another pair of paws should have been beside her own. Lonely nights that never ended, looming days that demanded more than she could offer. It was Icewind. It was Shrikeberry. And Littlestar. And Petalshade and Maplefrost too. But she’d never speak it aloud. It had taken moons for her to acknowledge and accept that grief. It had been hard, and ugly, and something she would never want anyone to see. She would never force that confrontation on someone. But she’d like to help, if she could. Her head lowered for Maplefrost to apply the poultice, paws kneading at the floor with her nerves. “Is borage hard to find? Are there any other herbs running low?” Her voice was soft, stuttering at first before coming in a quick rush, “Maybe I could help? I have a lot of free time at night and working the tunnels takes me all over the territory. I could, um…”Her voice slowly trailed off, warmth traveling to the tips of her ears in embarrassment. She always did that, got nervous about something and proceed to word-vomit. She cleared her throat, looking to the side while she waited for Maplefrost to finish applying the poultice. After a second to gather herself, she finished with a quiet, “not to step on any paws, of course. I’m sure Lionflower and Vulturepaw are more than capable of helping you forage for herbs.”She thought that, maybe, having more friends around might help Maplefrost. Even if she only dropped by every few evenings to lighten some of his work load, perhaps that might offer some kind of comfort. |
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storms make trees take deeper roots
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Post by cosmic on Feb 20, 2024 20:37:22 GMT -6
#s://i~pinimg~com/564x/fa/77/b9/fa77b9edfebe3d372faa67bb868d398f~jpg
All the tom managed to get out was a hum at Petalshade's first comment about settling the differences between her and the sun. At least she was optimistic about her future. The youth of the clan, he noticed, seemed to be nothing but troublemakers most of the time, especially with the recent batch of apprentices.
Maplefrost couldn't help but feel the gaze of the molly as he continued his work. Normally, it would caused his fur to prick with anger. He hated being watched. But, perhaps it was the subtle reminder of what was. When he was sweet on Shrikeberry and everything was right in the valley. Redthorn and Littlestar were alive, Thorngaze would pester him, and Shrikeberry was just... herself.
Maplefrost nodded with the thank for taking care of her all the moons that she had been alive. "All in a medicine cat's day, to serve." How much he longed to be able to call himself a warrior again, then Petalshade would be more of a comrade than his patient. Maybe he could actually get to know her and become friends.
But his mind carried on, as the noise of the den was deafening. It was almost like he zoned out while applying the thick poultice to her face. As he knew, cats were more uplifting and happy than he was. Thorngaze used to joke when they were adolescents that Maplefrost's heart was replaced with a rat's when they were kits. The tom had accepted his role as the gruff, angry tom that liked his herbs and no one else. But, how do these happy cats deal with grief? For him, he just became more angry and snappy. For those that were more cheerful, it didn't take them that long to get back into the swing of things. Of course, there were exceptions, like his brother. But he just seemed to have never been able to handle grief and figure out how to navigate it.
But Petalshade broke his thoughts with her question about borage. He was about to comment on her moving her mouth while he was trying to apply the medicine, but she stopped before he could get to it. However, before he said anything, and once he was finished with the mixed herb spread, she continued. Maplefrost allowed it to ponder in his mind a little bit, but he grabbed the used leaf. "Yeah, there's a lot of paws in the den now. With Lionflower and now my apprentice, it's gotten smaller in here." Well, that was optimistic, Maplefrost. If he knew anything about the tunneler, it would probably rub her the wrong way. Contrary to belief, Maplefrost didn't like being the bad guy all the time.
"But, at night, everyone's sleeping." Maplefrost paused after the statement, gathering all the loose twigs and leaves that were used throughout the day. "I tell you what. Of a night... not every night though, maybe every two moonrises... I'll tell you if there are any herbs that we couldn't find or didn't have time to look for during the day. I'll teach you their scents so you know what to look for." His tail swayed side to side as he looked back at the calico she-cat. It was good to keep the young occupied. "I'll let Lionflower know, and maybe he can give you some lessons too."
"I'd ask you take the discarded leaves and herbs every night as well, but let Vulturepaw do that. Teaches him responsibility and to keep his future den clean." Maplefrost was the best teacher, obviously.
"Would you like to try to find some borage tonight, since you seem eager?" The ginger tom then moved over to one of the herb storage holes with a leaf on top of it. Gently, the medicine cat lifted the leaf to allow the she-cat to take a smell of what the borage smelled like. The smell was all to familiar to the ginger brute, as his nose had become so accustom to it. Honestly, sometimes all the smells would mix together, and it overwhelmed his nose. But this is how Shrikeberry taught him, this is how he taught Vulturepaw, and now, he can teach more. |
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